Online Creative and Artist of CAREAUX. Caroll Lynn is known for her sneakers and feminine style. The content created is focussed on fashion and art combined with traveling - #SHECOZY
Wow.. it’s been a very long time since I wrote you all a Story Time.. It was the 3rd of January to be exact and hey we are already in May; “It’s gonna be May” *Justin Timberlake voice*.. Anyway I think I have to update a lot of you with everything that has happened in the past months. May is the month of all the blooming flowers and I think it’s a fresh start.
I turned 28 on the 28th of December and since it was the day to start my golden year, I wanted it to be special. I’m wondering, what will it be like? I started this year with a new love in my life and I have to admit, it was quite difficult at first. I didn’t really believe in time anymore, it had let me down multiple times but time heals. Time even heals the time. Cause when something is meant to be, the timing is exactly right
“I fell asleep on the cliff while soaking up the sun, hearing the waves crash.. why did life had to happen, why”.. Why is life so unpredictable, nothing in life is planned. I don’t believe when people say: “maybe the timing wasn’t right”. Time is a made up thing. You meet people exactly when you’re supposed to. I believe things happen for a reason and how you cope with it, is up to you. I’m this person who can see positivity in something negative. It sucks, it is a shitty situation but there isn’t much else to do than be strong and deal with it.
What has changed? Where do I need to start? I don’t even know what I would want to tell. I don’t even feel like I want to tell you everything. But what’s important is that I am okay. Even if some were my own decisions, life also happens to suddenly throw things your way you weren’t expecting and I accepted that change although I wasn’t too happy with it. But my friend told me a few days ago: “This is life, life happens”.
I feel my bag says a lot about me as a person. I feel it says something about how much I’ve grown. It showed me how hard I worked and this is how I rewarded myself. I always said to myself that if I ever start to make my own money and I worked hard for it, I would buy my first designer bag cause I deserved it right.. not knowing I would be swapping between bags now like it’s nothing. It even looks like a hobby: “which one will be my next goal” or “which one am I going to try to sell for a lot so I only need to put in €100”.. I know a lot of girls have this as a goal and it’s still goals to me as well. And maybe I can help you guys moving into the right direction for you up coming purchase.
And this is it. My Sydney journey came to an end. First time down under in 2014 till 2017. However I have a Sydney love in my heart and in my life, being in Sydney and living there is an offical closed chapter.. for now. I know a lot of people wonder what it’s like to be down under. It always seemed like a mission. It was always my biggest dream. From rescuers down under, to finding nemo. It was hard to think about it on my flight home. The more I thought about it, the scared I got. But why, why did I feel that? I eventually thought about all the good things coming my way and everything that’s waiting for me when I get home and in some way I was relieved.
Today I just chilled at the beach for a bit. Watched the waves crash onto the sand. I was just empty for a bit but the waves kept keeping my brains active, low key waiting for the sounds of it to go away. The aftermath. I was always used to waking up to negativity, however in the past two years this has drastically changed quickly. People who used to never like me, are now my close friends. The people who used to say bad shit about me on the internet, they are now nowhere to be found. I told myself I shouldn’t pay attention to what people think and say in the first place, ofcourse I used to take things personal. But now, I came this far and I shouldn’t even bother. I didn’t came this far to pay attention to strangers on the internet. This girl from a tiny town called Duiven, having the biggest dreams and loves a human being on the other side of the planet in Sydney. I came this far for my own future. The future I was holding onto while I watched the blue liquid turn into white foam to fade into the sand.
On Sunday’s I do a lot of thinking. Not because I plan to, it’s because it’s the only day in the week that gives me a bit of rest. On my flight from Copenhagen to Amsterdam I went through my pictures, my videos and even my screenshots. What did I capture? What got my attention? What was my focus? How many of the things and memories in my filmroll were marked as favorite? And most important, what did I delete?
There is always a first time for everything. My first time Hawaii was a fact. My first real trip with Fleur. And my first mural at POW!WOW!HAWAII as well.. first times always make me crave for more. I love the feeling after, cause no matter where I go, every trip I make, changes me. I like the flirt of the first time and it is hard to leave so much excitement. What did I learn this week? I have no idea where to start. It’s been a long time since I left a place with mixed feelings. Good or bad, either way this trip made me think even more different than I already did. The things I experiences during this trip were unbelievable. The friendships, the love, respect and trust but also new point of views and the beauty of life. This trip was so much more than just painting a wall. It was a trip to get to know yourself. It was the beginning of a new journey. Things I would never experience back at home. But maybe I should start with the fact that I painted my first mural at one of the biggest and most respected events worldwide “POW! WOW! HAWAII!” - also, this is a really big story time so thank you for reading..
A little bit of an explanation about the randomness of my deleting mood. I know that most of you think I am a blogger *MEEEEH* wrong. I am not even close to one and I don’t even want to be one. I am a women’s footwear designer, graphic designer and illustrator. I am the global brand ambassador of Puma, I have my own company/brand “CAREAUX” and I work at Filling Pieces. I have this “blog” to inspire people, sometimes to share a bit of information about a place I travelled to or about an illustration and whatsoever anyway..